Chapter 6

With trembling fingers, Jon slowly unbuttoned the pale pink cotton shirt Valerie wore. As he spread the fabric open, he could see Valerie’s pulse throbbing in her neck, and a very becoming blush creeping over her chest. Jon’s fingers itched to rip the clothes from her body, but had read between the lines when Valerie had said it’d been a long time since someone had held her close. What a crying shame. This woman was made to be held and to feel cherished. He did not want to rush this with her, although he wanted nothing more than to sink himself deep within her.

Jon ran reverent fingers across her neck and across her collarbone, making her shiver. He leaned in to trail light kisses where his fingers had been, and Valerie’s hands tightened their grip on his arms. The sensations assaulting Valerie made her weak. She didn’t know how this simple touching, these light kisses and caresses could go through to her very core and ignite such wanton feelings of lust. Jon was being gentle, but she didn’t want him to. She wanted him to be bold and forceful, and to take what he wanted from her. She wanted to get swept away in the passion and heat and oh! what he was doing with his mouth was sweet torture.

Jon had dipped his head to tease a nipple that had poked up at his gentle caresses. He rolled the nub in his mouth, dampening the bra that still covered it. He bit it lightly, and Valerie gasped. Jon smiled. He was relieved to know that she was as turned on as he was – that she wanted, no needed, this as much as he did.

Valerie shrugged out of her shirt, and set to work on the buttons of Jon’s. She couldn’t work the little buttons through their holes, she was shaking too much. “Do you especially like this shirt?” she asked.

Jon shrugged, continuing to kiss Valerie’s skin, wherever he could reach it. “I have no particular attachment to it,” he said. “Why?”

“Because these fucking buttons are seriously pissing me off,” she said, ripping the shirt open and sending the offensive bits of plastic flying. Jon sucked in a breath as Valerie began a soft, teasing exploration of her own. Her clever fingers danced across his skin, burning him where they touched. They left trails of fire as they swept from his shoulders to his waist and back again, and he nearly forgot he was trying to be gentle with her. Valerie could sense something wasn’t right, and she leaned back to look into Jon’s face.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, half afraid of the answer she would get.

“Nothing, just give me a second to get control of myself,” he answered on a rasp. His chest was heaving, and his hands were clamped onto Valerie’s hips. He was sweating and panting and, Valerie thought, looking gorgeously, dangerously aroused.

“I don’t want you to be in control of yourself,” Valerie answered before she could stop herself. “Do you know what a powerful feeling it is to know that I’m making you want to lose control?” She leaned in and planted a juicy kiss on one of Jon’s nipples, and he cried out, dropping his head back, and shutting his eyes. “Jon, look at me.” She waited until he did. “I want you. To take me. Now.”

With a slow smile, a smile that finally reached those gorgeous baby blues, Jon drawled, “Yes, ma’am.” He hauled Valerie hard up against him, and drove his tongue into her mouth. He backed her up until she was against the wall, and leaned in. One hand was holding her head captive while the other fumbled at her bra catch. When it finally released, Valerie let go of Jon’s waist long enough to pull it off her, and mashed her breasts into his chest, relishing the feeling of being skin-to-skin with him. The hair on his chest tickled her sensitive skin. Jon broke the kiss to drop to his feet and unfasten Valerie’s jeans. He pulled them and her panties down slowly, kissing each inch of creamy leg as it was revealed. By the time he got the garments completely off, Valerie was bracing so hard against the wall, she was amazed she didn’t press through it.

Jon scooped Valerie into his arms, and brought her to the bed. He yanked the duvet from it, and laid Valerie gently down on the pillows. He gazed hungrily at her; over her lush breasts to her trim waist and flat stomach, to the curls at the apex of her thighs; down her long legs to cute, pink-tipped feet. By now, his erection was painful in his pants, and he couldn’t wait any longer. He shucked shoes and pants like his life depended on it, and stretched out beside Valerie.

Valerie immediately knelt next to him, turned him on his back, and set to exploring his body with her hands much the same way he did hers with his eyes just moments before. Her light touch across his chest and hips and thighs nearly drove him over the edge. When her small hands grasped him firmly, one on his balls, the other on his shaft his eyes closed, and his head lolled to one side. Jon’s hands were fisting in the sheets, and he was shaking.

“Darlin’,” he said, “I seriously can’t take much of that. I’m sorry, but it’s been far too long.”

Valerie just smiled. She leaned down to take him into her mouth, shocked at her own brazenness. He seemed to bring it out in her. She had a fleeting thought of “if only Kallie could see me now,” and nearly giggled. It came out a hum, which made Jon arch on the bed. Pleased with that reaction, she hummed again as she moved her mouth over him. Jon reached for Valerie and pulled her from him. When she moaned in protest, he deftly flipped her under him, and drove into her with one hard thrust.

Valerie screamed his name as the feel of him inside her, stretching her, filling her, made her come. She didn’t realize just how wound up she was until he touched her. She couldn’t believe how fast this came upon her. Jon felt her squeezing and convulsing around her, and pumped into her hard and fast, and as she peaked a second time, again screaming his name, Jon joined her on the fall; no longer embarrassed that he had no stamina.

This time.

Chapter 5

Jon noticed two things about the house. First, it was too far from the front door to the bedroom. Second, Valerie’s bedroom had a better view of the beach and water than his did. The windows were open, allowing the sea breeze to ruffle the filmy white curtains and bring in the scents and sounds of the ocean.

Valerie noticed two things about bringing Jon into her bedroom. First, she was so nervous she could hardly think straight. Second, she was so turned on, she could hardly think straight. What the hell was she doing? This was not like her at all.

Jon pulled Valerie into his arms, and all thoughts were flushed from her mind. He swayed with Valerie to the music of the ebb and flow of the waves. It had a hypnotic effect on her, and she found herself resting her head against his shoulder and closing her eyes. This felt so good, so right. This simple human contact is what she missed most.

One of Jon’s hands was tracing lazy circles on her back, and the other was cradling her neck. His hands felt so strong, yet so gentle. Valerie turned her head so she could kiss Jon’s neck. She licked and nipped at him until he was gripping her hard now instead of holding her tenderly.

“Um, ow,’ Valerie said, giggling.

“Sorry, darlin’,” he said, chuckling low in his chest, and relaxing his hold on her. “But you brought it on yourself.” Jon adjusted his grip so that he was holding her hand clasped to his chest, and Valerie moved to tuck her head under his chin. They hadn’t stopped their gentle dance, and Jon couldn’t help himself; kissed the top of her head and started singing.

In a way I know my heart is waking up
As all the walls come tumblin' down
Closer than I've ever felt before and I know and you know
There's no need for words right now

I can feel the magic floatin' in the air
Being with you gets me that way

And I can feel you breathe, it's washing over me
Suddenly I'm melting into you
There's nothing left to prove, baby all we need is just to be
Caught up in the touch, slow and steady rush
And baby, isn't that the way love's supposed to be

I can feel you breathe
Just breathe

Valerie’s heart quickened. That honeyed, aged-whiskey voice whispering Faith Hill’s words of love and lust and wanting to her; it was too much for her to take. With unshed tears glistening in her eyes, she looked up at Jon, wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him so sweetly, he thought he’d died. He made a small groan in the back of his throat, and pushed a hand into her hair, while wrapping his other arm tightly around her, pulling her hips into his, showing her exactly what he was thinking and feeling at this moment.

The intimate contact was nearly Valerie’s undoing. She broke the kiss, an on a shaky breath said, “It’s been a long time since anyone has held me like that.” She hoped Jon wouldn’t make her say that it’d been more than two years since she’d been with anyone. She didn’t want to see pity in his eyes. Not now.

He smiled an ironic smile. His smile still didn’t reach his eyes. “Dariln’ it’s been so long for me, I’m surprised I haven’t embarrassed myself yet,” he whispered. Valerie’s eyes went wide. Surely he was kidding? He could have had any one of the thousands of women he’s seen since his divorce. Oh yes, Valerie read all about it in the papers, and had believed about a quarter of what she had read. No matter what was written, though, this man’s appeal, sex and otherwise, was still off the charts. She was surprised. Pleasantly surprised.

Jon chuckled at Valerie’s expression. “Don’t look so shocked.” He looked into her eyes, and Valerie’s heart stopped. “I haven’t met anyone I was interested in. There was nobody I wanted to be with. Not until tonight.”

“Oh,” Valerie breathed, afraid that anything louder would break the eye contact between them. She was pretty sure that she could spend an eternity just getting lost in those clear blue eyes. Jon was thinking the same thing about Valerie’s pure green ones. Valerie wasn’t sure who made the first move, but they were suddenly fused together at the mouth, tongues dueling; the fire of passion and wanting rising to engulf them.

When Jon came up for air, he moaned, his voice husky with desire. “Valerie, I want you. God help me, I want you now.”

Valerie tightened her hold on Jon’s shoulders and answered, “I want you too,” her own voice barely audible over the sounds of the surf crashing outside.

Chapter 4

“I don’t think I’ve ever had a woman literally fall at my feet,”Jon said, chuckling. “That’s a first for me.”

“Yeah, well,” Valerie countered, “I don’t think I’ve ever actually swooned.” She chuckled herself. “Of course, to keep your ego in check, please do recall I said I’d drunk an entire bottle of wine.” She fished around in the basket and came out with the proof. Jon laughed and took the bottle from her looking at the label.

“This is one of my favorite wines,” he said, looking at her closely. She was a pretty woman, younger than him, but he wouldn’t put her much past 37. She wore no makeup, and simple, tasteful jewelry. Her hair was a bit windblown, and there was a rosy tint in her cheeks that was very cute on her. Her clear green eyes reminded him of the colors of Ireland, one of his favorite places to be. A man could get lost gazing into those clear, emerald pools.

“I’ve got more, if you’d like a glass,” she said, her heart pounding. Where the hell did that come from? “You’ll have to use my glass, though, or,” she looked at him and saw a spark of interest in his eyes that made her lose her train of thought.

“Or?” he prompted.

“Or, you could come up to the house and I’ll get you a fresh one.”

“I’d like that. Very much.” He stood and held a hand out, which Valerie took, and pulled her to her feet. He reached down for the basket as Valerie grabbed the blanket and radio. They looked at each other for a long moment, not saying anything. Finally, Jon cleared his throat. “Um, lead the way?”

Valerie flushed red to her roots. “God, I’m sorry. I’m just finding this surreal.” She shook her head, trying to clear the cobwebs from it. “Follow me.”

She led Jon to the porch. To the right of the front door was a cozy tableau: two rocking chairs flanking a low table. All were painted white, and weathered a little by time. Valerie dropped her stuff to the floor in front of the table and dropped into one of the rocking chairs. She reached for the basket in Jon’s hand. Their hands touched, and for some reason, this contact sizzled. Valerie chalked it up to the wine. Maybe she wasn’t as sober as she thought. Valerie laid out the remains of her picnic on the table, and handed Jon the bottle of wine and an opener.

“You do the honors,” she said. “I’ll go get a fresh glass.”

“Hurry back,” he said. Why the hell did he say that? He shook his head as Valerie gave a little jump and disappeared into the house. Jon expertly uncorked the bottle, letting the wine breathe. He helped himself to one of the decadent chocolate-covered strawberries. He moaned to himself as the heady flavors mixed on his tongue. He sighed happily. This is exactly what she tasted like, he thought to himself. He closed his eyes and leaned back in the chair, rocking gently in time with the pounding waves, and smiling. This was the most relaxed he’d felt in some time.

The squeak of the door startled him – he looked over to see Valerie had come back with two clean glasses, and a plate of breads and soft cheeses to go with the spread already set.

“You didn’t have to feed me,” he said. “The wine would have been fine.” He took the glasses from her, and began to pour. He looked up to find Valerie sitting there, next to him, smiling. “What?”

“You’re a guy, I figured you must be hungry,” she said, teasingly, and motioned for him to lean in to her. “Then I noticed: you couldn’t help but to dive into my berries.” She reached out a finger to the corner of Jon’s mouth, where a trace of chocolate still remained. She swiped it onto her finger, showed it to him, and slowly brought her finger to her mouth. She licked the chocolate from it delicately, sending little shocks straight to Jon’s cock.

He watched as she licked all traces of the candy from her finger. Without a word, he selected another berry from the box, and held it out, showing it to Valerie. He took a bite, purposefully getting chocolate on his face. She leaned forward a little, the rocking of the chair making her unsteady. She once again reached out a finger to swipe the chocolate from his mouth. This time, Jon captured her wrist and brought her finger into his mouth. She closed her eyes at the contact, all but moaning out loud. Jon drew his chair back a little, making her falter again.

Valerie smiled. “What?” she said, concentrating on not falling out of her chair.

“I’m trying to see if you’ll fall at my feet again,” he said huskily.

“All it takes is a kiss,” Valerie said, her own voice a whisper.

Jon put the strawberry down on the table and stood. He pulled on Valerie’s hands until she was standing in the circle of his arms. He oh so slowly inched his head toward hers. When their mouths were a breath apart, he stopped. “Maybe I don’t want you to fall on the floor.”

“Then you’d better hold me tighter,” she said, stretching her tongue out to trace his lips.

Jon’s arms tightened around Valerie and he sipped from her lips gently. He leaned back to smile at her. “You taste like chocolate and wine. A very potent combination. Very sexy”

Valerie blushed. She was out of practice with the whole seduction game. She could handle the flirting, but anything else was beyond her. Her body knew what to do, however. It had been a long time since she had this intimate contact, and she craved it. She angled her hips into Jon more, pressing against his now very obvious erection. He hissed at the contact and drove his hands into her hair, angling her head for a deep kiss.

Valerie wrapped her hands around his waist and held on for the ride. She really would have fallen at his feet again; her knees were weak. She hadn’t felt this alive, this wanted, since before her husband -- well, since before. She wasn’t going to analyze this, she was just going to go with it.

“Valerie,” Jon said, breaking the kiss.

“Hmmmm?”

“I’m more than a little attracted to you.”

Valerie smiled, and pushed into him a little harder, making his eyes go wide. “Oh really? I hadn’t noticed.” She chuckled a little at his reaction. “Really, I could tell.” She kissed him lightly, and looked at him. “I am very attracted to you. It’s been a long time since I felt that way about anyone.”

Jon smiled and kissed Valerie again. Deeply. “What should we do about it?” He was toying with the earrings she wore, simple dropped pearls.

By way of answer, Valerie took Jon’s hand, and led him into the house.

Chapter 3

The man walking on the beach saw the beauty of the night all around him. The sky was a blanket of shimmering diamonds, undiminished by the lights of the city. Clouds didn’t dare to cover its beauty. The moon, a full, round, glowing orb low in the sky seemed to smile down on any creatures venturing out.

In the distance he could see a figure dancing with wild abandon, and could hear faint, tinkling laughter carried on the wind. A woman’s laughter. He could hear something else too; he thought he heard music playing. As he watched, the figure saluted the moon and yelled something into the night. It danced and twirled and fell to the ground. He smiled at her, for he felt certain now that the figure was a ‘her’. She seemed to be enjoying the night, and it did something funny to his stomach. He felt a flutter there he hadn’t felt for some time. He wanted to meet this woman, and to see just what it was that was making her dance and laugh.

He shook his head. He had to stop this. He had to stop looking for salvation in others. He had to find his own way back to the land of the living. One of the lines from one of his old songs played an endless loop in his head: I’m gonna die if I don’t start to live again. That pretty much summed it up for him. He’d been such a wreck the last six months, since he signed those papers. His friends would argue that he’d been a wreck, and quite a bit of a bastard, since the separation a year before that. He argued back that after nearly a 20-year relationship, he had the right to mourn its demise. They agreed, but told him to get on with it already. He promised he’d try.

The man was out at his house in the Hamptons because the beach had always been an inspirational place for him. The beach was a constant. The tides ebbed and flowed. The water rose and crashed on the shore with relentless sameness. The sands shifted and moved until all traces of humanity were wiped out, day after day, year after year. It was that consistency, that ‘something to depend on’ that made it an ideal place for him to gather his thoughts and get his life on track. This place reminded him that he was just a small bit of what existence was. There was so much more out there. This place let him remember that things all happen for a reason. He looked up the beach again. Maybe this woman in the distance was a sign. Maybe she could…

“Maybe nothing, you asshole,” he said out loud. He stopped in his tracks and looked out to sea. He searched the waves for answers, but there weren’t any. He searched the stars for clues, but saw only their sparkling beauty. He yelled into the darkness, letting his anger and aggression and sadness out. Hell, if that woman could shout at the moon, so could he.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Valerie had kept her eyes on the man’s progress – she knew now it was a man on the beach. She hadn’t had enough to drink to ignore the possible danger of meeting a stranger on the beach, but she did have enough to want to see if the danger was the good kind. She saw the figure stop and turn toward the sea, shouting. The sound was mournful and sad and angry, and she wanted nothing more than to know what made this man make that noise. She gathered her food back into the basket she had carried down from the house, turned down the radio, and waited. Waited to see if he would continue his journey or turn back.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The man felt better for having let some of that out. He cast a sidelong glance at the woman down the beach, and made a decision. He wasn’t going to over-think things, and he wasn’t going to let his fucked up past get in the way of the present. He wanted to see what that woman was so damned happy about, and he would. He strode purposefully toward the solitary woman.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Valerie could tell from this distance that there was a purpose to his step. As he approached, she realized he looked familiar, but she couldn’t place where she knew him from. His walk, more of a strut actually, was teasing the back of her head. Where did she…… Then he got closer, and she saw the hair. Then he stopped in front of her, and she saw the eyes.

“Holy shit,” she said.

The man smiled a dazzling smile that didn’t quite reach those beautiful, clear, blue eyes. “Good evening to you, too,” he said.

Valerie was mortified. “I’m so sorry! It’s just that – you’re – I mean I know you know who you are – Jesus, I’m sorry.” She gave her forehead a little slap and stood up. “I’ve had the better part of a bottle of wine, well, the whole thing actually, and I think my common sense and courtesy have suffered for it.” Valerie took a deep breath and looked straight into his eyes. “I’m Valerie, Jon,” she said, putting out a hand. “What can I do for you?”

Jon’s smile reached into his eyes a little at her discombobulation. No matter how many times he’s met people, what he called ‘regular people’, normal non-celebrity people, the reactions he got never ceased to amaze him. They varied of course, but for the most part, people recognized him and didn’t know how to act. Like he was better than them or something. He wasn’t better; just different. He took Valerie’s hand in his, and brought it to his lips to kiss it. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Valerie. You can tell me what has you so damned happy.”

Valerie was puzzled. What the hell was he talking about? “You mean my little celebration here?” Jon nodded. “Well, it’s really none of your business, but I’m celebrating the first day of the rest – the best – of my life. I’m putting my past firmly behind me, and I’m not looking back. It’s quite a relief, actually. The past two years have been hell, and I'm tired of not enjoying my life. My friend Kallie, that’s her house back there that I’m staying in, she’s going to be very proud of me. She's been after me for months to get my ass in gear.” She was rambling now, and couldn’t stop. “Please shut me up; I can’t seem to find the ‘off’ button.”

Jon shrugged. There was one sure fire way to get most women to shut up. He pulled Valerie into his arms and kissed her. After a moment’s hesitation, once the shock wore off, Valerie wrapped her arms around Jon’s waist and kissed him back. He broke the kiss after a minute and released Valerie, who promptly fell on her ass.

“Jesus, are you okay?” Jon asked, kneeling beside her. He didn't know whether to be concerned or amused.

“Dayum, Jon, a bottle of wine and a kiss from you is a lethal combination.” She grinned at him, shaking her head. “You did get me to shut up though, and I think I’m nearly sober now. You’re better than coffee.”

Jon laughed, and this time, his eyes sparkled and danced.

Chapter 2

Valerie stood in the shambles of her bedroom, incredulous at what Kallie was doing. Nearly everything she owned was strewn about the room in different piles. Kallie was now pawing through a pile of dresses, holding up different ones at arm’s length, frowning, and tossing them back into the pile.

“You don’t have any decent short, flirty dresses,” Kallie lamented.

“And what the hell do I need those for?” Valerie demanded. “I’m going to the beach, not a party.”

Kallie was exasperated. “Just because you aren’t planning on anything doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be prepared.” And on it went. Kallie wasn’t happy until Valerie had two suitcases full of clothes. “Options” she called them. Valerie didn’t have the heart to tell her best friend that she would probably end up wearing her favorite faded jeans and t-shirts the whole time. She just wanted to get the packing done.

Finally, Valerie was on her way. She had a long drive ahead of her, but that didn’t bother her. She had her music, a full tank of gas, and a mission. She was not going to waste this long weekend. Today was Wednesday. She was going to come back to Albany on Monday morning a new woman, or die trying.

As Valerie’s Jeep approached the Long Island Expressway, she started to get excited. Kallie’s place was practically in the ocean. She could look out the window of the master bedroom and see the water. There was private access to the beach; it was perfect. The house on Gracie Lane had been in Kallie’s family for generations. Not long enough for them to be considered Bonnackers, but pretty damn close. Kallie could sell the place for tens of million dollars if she wanted to, hell the beach rights alone would bring that in, but she never would. Kallie loved the beach almost as much as Valerie did.

April was the best time to go to the Hamptons. Before Easter, if you could manage it. Once Easter rolls around, all the city people started going out on weekends to get their houses ready for the Season. Forget going in the summer; you’d be lucky to make it from Dressen’s to the other end of Newtown Lane in anything less than fifteen minutes once summer got into full swing.

As Valerie drove through Southampton, her excitement grew. She’d been driving for hours now, and the Sip ‘n’ Soda was coming up. She had her very first Lime Rickey there a million years ago, when she had come out with Kallie’s family on vacation when she was ten. She had to stop now; it was tradition. Whenever one or both of them traveled out to the manse, as they jokingly called it, they always stopped for Lime Rickeys.

She pulled into a coveted spot out front, and went in. The place was just as she remembered it; a 50’s-style diner with the best décor this side of Mayberry. She sat at the counter and ordered her drink, and a plate of fries to go with it. This was the first step in coming back to herself; indulging in guilty pleasures without feeling guilty about it.

After her snack, she paid her bill, leaving a generous tip, and headed back to the street. She hesitated a moment before getting into her car, the nostalgia getting to her. Valerie missed those carefree days of her youth. She may not be as young as she used to be, but she could be as carefree. She just had to put the last two years, and the previous ten of her marriage, behind her and move on. For heaven’s sake, she was 40, not dead.

Valerie pulled back out onto the main road, and continued her journey. Another half hour and she’d be at the house on Gracie Lane. Another five minutes after that, and she’d be on the beach. She could feel her soul lighten just at the thought of the miles of sand and acres of ocean.

When she got to the house, Valerie stood on the porch, gazing out toward the water. The smell of the sea air was invigorating, and the sound of the waves crashing to the shore was intoxicating. Unable to suppress a smile, she ran to the edge of the porch and vaulted the railing, landing in the soft sand below. God, it’d been years since she’d done that. Valerie kicked off her shoes and ran for the water’s edge. She stood there, heedless of the frigid water lapping at her feet, for the better part of an hour, just watching the waves, and feeling the breeze blow away some of the sadness of the past years.

After watching the sunset, Valerie went back to the house to unpack, and to make a shopping list.

She was going to throw herself a party.

Chapter 1

As this anniversary approached, Valerie got quiet. It happened every April without fail. She would start to drift into a place where she seethed; a barely controlled rage just simmering beneath the surface. A rage that made her friends have that concerned look. Her closest friend, Kallie, had urged her to get away; to do something other than allow the memories to rile her up like that. She usually spent these days pacing around her huge house in Albany – the house she and her husband had hoped in and dreamed in and played in and loved in, but that now sat as a mocking reminder of the sham of their marriage.

It was time to let go. On some level, Valerie knew that. She just didn’t know how. She couldn’t find anyone that could make her forget what that man did to her. It had been almost two years since the policeman had come to the door with terrible news. At first, she was confused. How could her husband be dead? Here? In a hotel room in Albany? He was at a conference in California, so they must be mistaken. There was no mistake, however, nor was there any mistaking the decidedly young, not-a-sister woman in the hotel room with him. The woman’s boyfriend had followed them to the hotel, and killed them both, then himself, in a jealous rage.

The grief over losing her husband had come swiftly, and went just the same; too quickly, Valerie thought, but the anger and mistrust was still there. And, at this time of the year, the anniversary of his death, the anger was always stronger than ever.

Two years, and she still hadn’t been able to let go – not really. They had been in love once. Hopelessly, desperately, I’ll-die-if-I-can’t-be-with-you in love. Back then, she could catch a glimpse of him out of the corner of her eye and tell you exactly what he was wearing. Back then, she could hear his voice in a stadium full of people and hone in on it, hearing every word he spoke with absolute clarity. Back then, she couldn’t get enough of his body, of his strength and smells and taste.

Now, she couldn’t clearly recall his face, but remembered he was beautiful. Now, she could no longer really remember the timbre of his voice, but had a notion it was deep and quiet. She couldn’t remember the weight of his body on hers, but her body remembered the feelings and sensations of being cherished. The betrayal was so complete, that she hadn’t been able to even look at another man, especially a good-looking one. Maybe now it was time.

“Val, I love you, but you’re going to have to get over this. It has been two years.” Kallie echoed her thoughts. They’d been friends for so long and as close as sisters, that they often joked that they shared a brain, and must have been twins in a former life. The two women were having coffee at a local shop.

“I know, K,” Valerie said. “I’m trying, but nothing is working.”

Kallie laughed at her friend. “You call what you’ve been doing ‘trying’? You’ve been on exactly ten dates in the last year and a half.” When Valerie looked like she was going to interrupt, Kallie held up a slender hand. “I’m being generous, and giving you the first six months to grieve, but I think you were done with that in six days.”

Valerie smiled. Her friend was right. She hadn’t really made an effort to get back out there. Frankly, it was too much hassle. And for what? For someone to make her feel love again just to dash her emotions and hopes and dreams again? No thank you. She said as much to her friend.

“Val, you’ll never get over until you get on,” Kallie sighed. “Take my advice, and get out of here. Go to the beach. You know how that soothes you. Head out to the Cape, or here,” she dug into her purse, and extracted a keyring. “Use my place in the Hamptons. It’s pretty dead this time of year out there, so you should be able to have privacy to work through your shit.”

Valerie hesitated before taking the keys from her friend. “I guess I could head out there tonight. I already arranged for someone to cover my shifts at the restaurant for a couple of days --”

“Good,” Kallie interrupted. “You’re a real bitch to the customers when this time of the year comes around.”

Valerie laughed. “Yeah, I know. I think things are slow at the office…” she trailed off, thinking about her crappy day job. “Alright, I’ll go. I’ll spend a few days on the beach and get my life back into perspective.”
Kallie stood. “I’ll help you pack. You never know who you’ll meet when you’re out there.”

Valerie stood to embrace her friend. “You’re crazy. I’m not going to –” she saw the look on her friend’s face. There was no talking her out of this. She smiled. “What would I do without you to give me a kick in the ass when I need it?” she asked.

Kallie laughed. “You will never have to find out, my dear. You’re stuck with me forever.”

The two women left a tip on their table and left.

Prologue

A solitary figure sat huddled in the sand. A woman’s figure. Her arms were wrapped around her knees as she gazed sightlessly out into the inky blackness of the ocean; a look of resignation and acceptance on her face. Her pink-tipped toes dug into the sand; the cool, wet texture oddly soothing. She closed her eyes as a gentle sea breeze tugged at the wisps of honey-blonde hair that escaped the knot at the nape of her neck. Around her were strewn the remnants of a solitary picnic: a single empty wine glass, a plate of cheese and grapes, and a half-eaten box of chocolate-covered strawberries.

A radio played softly by her side, and she smiled at the irony of the DJ’s song selection. This was one of her favorite songs long before it took on new meaning for her. She cranked the radio as high as it would go, and sang along at the top of her lungs.

An angel's smile is what you sell
You promise me heaven, then put me through hell
Chains of love got a hold on me
When passion's a prison, you can't break free

You're a loaded gun
There's nowhere to run
No one can save me
The damage is done

Shot through the heart and you're to blame
You give love a bad name
I play my part and you play your game
You give love a bad name
You give love a bad name

She filled her glass with wine again, emptying the bottle. She shrugged; she had another two bottles if she needed them. She stood tall and raised her glass. With a sneer, she toasted the moon. “Goodbye, you bastard!” she shouted into the night. A lonely bird answered her shout.

She danced crazily in the moonlight, her hair coming completely loose from its bindings and flowing around her. She spun and danced and laughed and sang until she was so dizzy she thought she’d throw up. Then her legs got tangled together, and she dropped laughing onto the blanket that she brought with her to protect her clothes from the sand. When she recovered from her giggles, she looked up to see a figure off in the distance.

Well hell, she thought, this was supposed to be a private celebration.